Thursday, August 10, 2006
[home] is where.........
tonight, my childhood home belongs to a stranger.
my family has moved out and someone else has moved in. i haven't really thought about it much, because of all the other transitions going on in my life, but now, tonight, knowing that i would now be a stranger in the yard i mowed for 17 years, i find myself missing it.
the intern-architect in me, completely understands. people move. they move companies, they move residences, it's what keeps us in business. but the eight year old in me is having a hard time. the truth is, i haven't spent a lot of time there recently, having lived various places, but it was always home. a place i knew was always there, waiting for me, just the way i left it.
it was the only home i had ever known. i went from the hospital to that house. my view of this world began on the corner of foxbrier and main. starting slow. not being allowed to leave the yard at first, and then finally given permission to cross the street to check the mail. when i got my first set of [bike] wheels, i ruled the neighborhood, and could even go to the quick-trip to get a pop. even in highschool, i kept within the city limits, always returning to that house at night. when college came, i found myself spending less and less time there. but it was always home.
what ifind myself missing the most though, is mowing. i loved it. it was never a chore to me. i'd put on my headphones, zone out, and think about life, while still keeping straight lines in the yard. when i first started mowing i would listen to "tiffany" and "rick astley" with my red kool-aid tape player with belt clip. through the years i moved up to a "walkman" then a "discman". the last time i mowed, i had "the decemberists" and "clap your hands say yeah" playing over my ipod.
the reason i loved mowing so much, is the time it gave me to think. for two hours no one would bother me. it was suburban meditation. that yard isn't just filled with the mulch from grass clippings, it is scattered with several years of my thoughts. little ponderings like "do you really get a free tootsie pop, if you get an indian and a star on the wrapper", to those life long thoughts about relationships and career decisions, that never seem to end.
home, will always be with my family, no matter where we are, but that house on north main was the setting of my childhood. housing memories, experiences, adventures, trying circumstances, and life lessons.
well i better end this post before it sounds too much like a "wonder years" episode. but i do believe i'll play a little joe cocker tonight.