Thursday, September 23, 2010

personal af[fair]

a generous gift of a free admission ticket, and a lack of anyone to take along, meant i enjoyed a little [self]date to the kansas state fair this past weekend. just [myself] and [i].

the day didn't start out too terribly early. [i] let [myself] sleep in a bit. mostly because i know [myself] isn't a fan of getting up early, but neither am [i], so it all worked out. after getting up and around the car left a little before noon. the drive was fairly uneventful, but the radio was tuned to the classic country station, which [i] thought was the perfect way to get [myself] in the mood for a good ol' time at the fair.

both [i] and [myself] had been involved in 4-h growing up, so the first visit was to the livestock barns, filled with every breed of chicken, rabbit, sheep, goat and cattle imaginable. in the poultry exhibit [i] got a little too close to a rooster cage while trying to take a picture, and the little, for lack of a better term, cock, bit my finger. [i] was pissed, but the humor of the situation was not lost on [myself]

after that, it was time to get something to eat. [i] really wanted to try this year's "fair food fad", which was a krispy kreme cheeseburger. however upon inspection, [myself] thought it was gross, so [i] decided to spare [myself] the scene of devouring it. pronto pup seemed a more fitting and slightly healthier alternative. after finishing an amazing corn dog, it was decided to enjoy some ice cream. however, [i] apparently have never eaten ice cream from a cone while sporting a beard before, and accidentally got ice cream all over [myself]. it might sound cute, but it wasn't. [i] got a napkin and cleaned up [myself].

after the ice cream mishap, a stroll through the rides was next. [myself] would have probably enjoyed a ride or two, but [i] was too cheap to buy [myself] any tickets. [myself] then thought about trying out one of the games, but honestly, if a prize would have been won, [i] didn't want to walk around the fair awkwardly trying to hold a giant jamaican banana, especially with [myself].

just when the [self]date seemed to be failing, the pig races happened. as hokey and cheesy as it was, it ended up being a riot to watch and was enjoyed by [myself], [i], and everyone else in attendance.

as the day started to come to an end, it was time to head back. during the ride home, it was discovered [i] smelled like corn dog and barn, a combination of odors not enjoyed by [myself], so the windows were rolled down. heading into wichita [i] thought about getting a few drinks to end the night, but it was easy to see [i] wore [myself] out, so the date ended.

i'm not terribly sure [i] would ask [myself] out again. [i] really wasn't thrilled spending the day with [myself]. honestly [myself] is a little boring. then again [i] probably didn't help things out being more focused on taking photos, instead of enjoying a day getting to know [myself]. who knows? maybe [i] could find something better to do with [myself], but at this point in time, [i] should probably look for someone else to spend time with. [myself] would probably agree.


Helen E said...

Abi just asked what I was laughing about. From down the hall. Well played, Wittman. Wish I could have been your date too.

Jerrod said...

Seriously one of the funniest things I've ever read. Good job.