[beat]week

there's something about this time of year, that makes the number of miles davis songs played on my ipod increase. with "autumn leaves" creating an internal soundtrack in my head, my mind is allowed to wander. as i listen to the extended trumpet riffs, my mind pictures, dark, smokey coffee houses, poetry, and eventually the beatnik culture.

with this mood already set, you can imagine how thrilled i was when i heard of the several "beatnik" activities that took place last week. first of all, newman university, had a gallery showcasing kansas's own beat experience. in coordination with the exhibit, they also held a reading of poems by allen ginsberg. topping off this beat week the movie, "william s. burroughs: a man within" was featured in wichita's tallgrass film festival.

attending these three events made me realize two things. first of all, the romantic, idealized, hollywood-esque image of the beatnik culture i had in my head a few years ago, is diminishing rapidly. it goes far deeper and darker then the beret-wearing-goatee sporting-maynard-g-kreb-types, i had once pictured. reading kerouac had given me a better description of what it really was, but discovering more about ginseberg and burroughs took it to a whole other level. secondly, i was amazed to found out how much kansas played in this sub-culture. not only did burroughs spend the last years of his life here, but one of ginsberg's most famous poems is entitled "wichita vortex sutra" an anti war poem heavily laced with city references and counter-culture feelings.

i feel like i've taken way too big of bite from the beatnik buffet this weekend. looking into the meaning ginsberg's poem, and visualizing the places he mentions, has me exhausting the internet for as much information as i can find. expect another blog on this subject later. for now, i'll crank up "so what" and see what wikipedia knows.

it's all about your [line]

in dance, it's all about your line, once you loose your line, you never get it back. well...at least that's what cate blanchett's character says in "the curious case of benjamin button". luckily for me that's not really the case in sketching.

last friday i headed to the fisch haus, where the exhibit was their annual "living statues" show. dancers from ballet wichita, were set up on a stage in the gallery and struck 3-5 minute poses, allowing anyone in the audience a chance to sketch, draw, paint and photograph them.

now, i'll be the last one to tout my sketching ability, one look at my friends' sketch books, lets me know exactly where i stand, but that doesn't stop me from enjoying it, and always trying to find ways to improve. the opportunity to switch from the static objects my profession is based on, to the dynamacy of the human form, was a great change of pace.

frontier[photographer]

every time i shoot with film, i think of daniel boone....

i was told a story when i was a kid about daniel boone. when daniel was young and growing up in the american frontier, his father wanted to teach him how to shoot and hunt. to do this, he would only give his son one bullet per day, and send him out into the wild. with only one shot, young daniel would have to be very conscious of how he spent it. if he took a shot he couldn't make, the bullet was wasted, as well as the day. he learned quickly to wait until all the conditions were perfect before taking the shot.

here are a few shots from my "trigger happy" outing the other day.

the [key] to any acting career

if you've been reading this blog for a while, you may or may not remember some years ago, i had the opportunity to be an extra in an independent film shooting in wichita. you may or may not also remember the story of how i was promoted from just an extra to cashier #2!

well...after years of waiting, the film finally made it's wichita debut the other week! it was the opening movie for the tallgrass film festival held every fall. over the years i've kept in touch with a handful of the other extras. there's something to be said about a group of strangers stuck in a room together with nothing to do for ten hours but play cards...it bonds you. anyway, upon hearing it was showing, we all bought tickets so we could enjoy the film together. while the movie played, we would point out when we saw each other in the background and marvel at ourselves on the big screen. i, of course, anxiously waited for the cashier#2 scene in the hardware store. halfway into the movie, it came. the lead actor walked into the store and approached the cash register. my heart pounded...this was it...my big screen debut! this would be my "brad-pitt-in-thelma-and-louise" moment. i waited for the camera to change angles, wondering the whole time how i would look! i waited...and waited..and waited. the angle never changed. the lead actor tossed some change on the counter, picked up a package off screen, and than walked out.

yup...cashier#2 had been cut.

my big moment had ended up on some editing room floor. as the next scene took place, i was left wondering if my expression had not been right? was my motivation wrong? had i not conveyed the feeling of being a cashier in the early 1900's. did my face not transmit to the audience how important this package was? did my character not further the plot enough? the obvious answer was, no, it did not.

my disappointment didn't last long as i found i had made it into a few background shots, for a total screen time of about half a second. even with minimal face time, the whole experience was worth it. after the film, the director kevin willmott and lead actor wes studi stayed to answer questions before everyone headed to the opening night gala. after the event, my friends and i went out to eat and continued discussing films and future auditions. the night ended with me feeling very full of myself, ready to move to hollywood. as i went to start my truck, trying to figure out how to get ari gold as my agent and who might fill out the rest of my entourage, the key broke off in the ignition, rendering my truck unable to start. i walked home that night, alone, in the dark, with thoughts of my own series quickly vanishing. i called a locksmith the next day. he tinkered around and eventually got the other half of the key out. as i looked at the bill he handed me, which, being on a weekend, was extremely high, the total was a very familiar number.

it was, almost to the dollar, the same amount i had been paid for two days of work as an extra.


this kind of thing never happens to ted danson.

[off]line and no[line]

i love classic movies......around this time of year, i love classic christmas movies.

while watching these little holiday gems, i'll admit, part of me wishes i could spend christmas in an old vermont inn, or the town of bedford falls. everyone and everything is so genuine and honest in these films. you never see the characters arguing over parking spots at the mall, or fighting to grab the last "must-have" gift of the season.

taking note of this, and needing another blog post for this month, i set out to create my own little norman rockwell christmas. it seems in most every christmas movie the people travel in and out of stores along a snowy sidewalk. that's what i'd do! no computers or malls for me this year!

i decided not to buy anything on-line or venture into any of the national"big-box" stores. this year i spent weekends discovering new stores and shops i never knew existed. i traded the craziness of the mall parking lot for the slow meandering of walking down a sidewalk. instead of dealing with endless lines of cashiers, and spent time talking with shop owners. these smaller stores almost always offered me something to drink with one in particular offering me a mimosa's while i shopped!

i was able to get most of my gifts, as well as supplies to wrap everything up, at local, out of the way stores. i did venture into one large retail store to get a gift, but it's only because i had a coupon i wanted to use up. to be honest, that hour was by far the most stressful of the season, and one hour isn't that bad.

i know it's not possible to create the perfect "hallmark" christmas, but that's not really what i was going for. i just wanted to re-create a shopping season before malls, cars, and the internet. all things invented to make our life easier.....for some reason cause of a lot of stress this time of year. wondering in and out of these small stores and chatting with random people, really put me in the holiday mood this year.

the only thing left to do is spend time with friends and family. the people you love the most.

film noir[ed]

earlier this year, i auditioned for a small movie fellow blogger, the thing about trains, was working on. i auditioned for the part of jack, who was an eccentric photographer. a part i knew i would have to scour the depths of my inner soul in order to play, but none the less one i thought i could portray.

i few days later, i found out that i had received the part. after being fitted for a wardrobe, the shoot date came. after spending a few hours getting into character, i was ready. on the set, i had to keep asking myself,

"what's my motivation?"

"why so i want to take so many pictures?"

"what am i searching for?"

"can someone get me a coffee!"

the shoot lasted all day and the other actors and crew were some of the best that i've ever had the pleasure of working with. lets just see what the academy thinks.


alright....i'm being very facetious.... the truth is, i know now why they say a movie is made great in the editing room. the crew did an amazing job! the music, the color, the shots! all great! it was great being a part of it.

to veiw it, please click here